Monday, September 13, 2010

At Odds

Recently I have been posting ads on craigslist (www. in order to find a suitable roommate to replace our previous roommie who got married.

I discovered in the process that my roommate and I were at odds about our final result. I eventually had to ask her what was going on. I wondered when I was getting a ‘yes’ she would say ‘no.’ I found out that she wanted a male, different in terms of interests and/or occupation, and growth, while I wanted a female, similar interests, and harmony. Now how do you compromise on gender?! (Ruff! Ruff!!)

During the interview process, I somewhat reluctantly agreed to meet the son of a friend of hers who has a mental health disability. Now I didn’t know that about him initially. However despite that, I immediately got a ‘no’ as soon as I saw him inside of our front door, then when I shook his hand, and again later when we were talking with him.

I ended up going against my better wishes and judgement and agreed that he move in feeling somewhat pressured. There were a few times during the month where he would call and show concern for my needs (being a light sleeper for example), but when this occurred the last Friday before the end of the month, a red flag went up for me.

This time, I didn’t feel right so I spoke with his mother briefly and then left a message for him. He called me back later that night but I decided I wanted to sleep on it. Then with an extremely busy Saturday having our carpets cleaned and two appointments, I didn’t have time to phone him nor could hear his two messages that he had left me. I was also still undecided.

All of a sudden a woman came to mind. I felt the need to contact her to get an objective opinion as she is extremely intuitive. I barely told her anything not even the person's name when she proceeded to tell me something that confirmed my restlessness that I had felt most of the past month (in August). When I finally heard her answer and got the ‘no,’ I realized that my intuition had been guiding me all along. It was heeding me, whispering to me in the form of my restless heart, mind, and spirit.

I felt lighter, like a weight had lifted off me. And I remembered a way to know if a decision is right or not: imagine what would happen if you follow through with a decision (in this case if he moved in) and sense how your body/mind feels. This also confirmed to me the ‘no’ that I received right from the start.

How many times has this happened to you (where you don’t heed the call)? It happens a lot to me. Even though I am extremely intuitive, this time – as most times - I was too much in the middle of it all, in the thick of things that I couldn’t see or feel with clarity.

My intuition is always right and I mean that sincerely. I’m not kidding. It’s just that I don’t always pay attention to it as I ideally ‘should.’ It would save me a lot of trouble, time, heartache, frustration, angst, worry, you name it. And not only on my end, but the other person(s) on the other end as well.

So, learn the lesson from me so you don’t have to go through pain and turmoil. Trust your first impulses, your instincts, your intuition however it informs you. Trust me. Trust yourself!

p.s. While posting this, my roommate and I are still on the hunt of a roommate. I got a ‘yes’ to two men, but both backed out for different reasons, one of whom I thought was a perfect fit. Time will tell...

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