One thing I love about it is connections, connections to people. I always seem to make a new acquaintance with at least one soul, even if the encounter may be somewhat brief. This year it was at least three: on the ‘dance floor’ and at a table while dining and listening to music. And then there are always ‘old’ familiar faces I see, faces from my past (some from years ago) and some more recent (such as some members of the Burstin’ with Broadway choir, www.burstinwithbroadway.com that I’m in, this year being the third).
One such familiar face was that of a young boy. It wasn’t instant recognition as much as a familiarity as in ‘I think I know that boy’ kinda way. I saw him dancing or attempting to do so with his younger brother; I could tell they were brothers because they looked quite alike.
When I saw him return to his mother, I looked to see if I remembered her face, as I’m usually excellent at face recognition. This time I couldn’t quite tell as she wore sunglasses.
A short while later I saw they were leaving and scurried up to them. Indeed, he was in fact the young lad I had seen last year when I was attempting to launch my dream. He, in my opinion, was an ideal ‘student’ as he was full of exuberance and passion. He really wanted to sing and I loved that about him, mainly his passion and energy.
I felt more committed then to my dream, in sharing it with children such as this boy. His heart-felt enthusiasm touched me deeply. Unfortunately, even though his mother was fairly supportive, there was an issue to consider. I think it had to do with the timing in terms of vacation.
Needless to say, I felt that the universe - God/Spirit whichever term you prefer to use - was kicking my butt, but this time not forcefully but gently. However, I know I need to heed the call this time or else I’ll not only be disappointed, but disheartened and discouraged as well. And, not to mention that I would be kicked in the butt big time so-to-speak by Spirit if I didn’t. Furthermore, the boys and girls who could be potential participants would be missing out.
In a spontaneous piece of writing a number of years ago (2004 in fact!) during Tama Kieve’s workshop based on her book, This Time I Dance! Creating the Work You Love (www.awakeningartistry.com), I felt I channelled this message to myself, my soul: “...They’re waiting. ... The children need you. You can do this. The universe will support you ...” (This was similar in part to another message I received intuitively also a number of years ago. Read my Aug. 7th posting about the latter statement in ‘Surreal Experiences.’)
Yet all this time I’ve been afraid. FULL of fear. Afraid to take action because I judged myself. Part of Marianne Williamson’s quote from her book, A Return to Love based on ACIM (A Course in Miracles) comes to mind: “... who am I to be brilliant ... talented, fabulous?” After all, I'm not a musician or a choir director. (My first two blog postings come to me now as I’m typing this. I think I need to re-read them! You may wish to too!)
In my case, it was fear that fuelled my lack of motivation. Despite this, last year for some reason I decided to plunge in headfirst through my fears, into the deep end in attempting to make my dream a reality. So close, and yet so far!
But I’m still restless. Rather, my heart and mind won’t be still concerning this dream as I have visions or intuitions that come to me sporadically.
For example, during my recent holiday on the Sunshine Coast whilst in the hot tub, I received a vision of an opening number of my to-be-choir’s performance. I also found a beautifully smooth stick in the ocean and knew immediately that it was to be my baton, my choir baton. (Not that I need one of course as I thought I’d be using my hand(s) exclusively.) Shortly thereafter, the thought of a feather, an eagle feather came to mind to hang from one end. Though I didn’t find an eagle feather – hopefully one day! – I did find a beautiful multi-coloured feather, possibly from a gull.
So Spirit still speaks to me, maybe not in words, but in different ways. I feel I need to heed the call this time. Time is ticking away. Life is precious. I need to share my gifts and have others, i.e., children share theirs with me too ... and the world!
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