Lost ... and Found

For my faithful blog readers (whom I appreciate very much, thank you!), you may have wondered what happened, as you haven’t heard from me for awhile. What happened to me? Perhaps you thought that I died or that I’ve been super busy and/or had writer’s block.

Two main events occurred that prevented me from writing just over two month’s time!

One circumstance was that I changed from looking for a third roommate to share a room in a house to looking for a place to live. It took time and energy as well as with associated tasks like removing belongings from storage, and downsizing (which included donating and selling items).

December rolled along which is usually a very busy month for me. This year I attended various vocal concerts as usual, but I also baked my family's favourite traditional cookie recipe: my Mom's delicious European cookies that she usually bakes for Christmas. I decided to start the tradition by making them for Christmas gatherings and friends. My birthday then came two months to the day that I last wrote my blog.

I have an expression that I made up about myself to describe some of my passions: If I don’t sing or dance, I’m either sick or depressed.

Similarly, I sometimes can't write. It’s usually a matter of being either really busy and/or not feeling inspired. My preference is to write ‘in the flow’ when words come intuitively to me (as they often do) or through my fingers when I type (or write). When they don't, I prefer not to write.

Unfortunately, not all my writing comes from Spirit, that state of natural flow and grace (though I wish of course! That would be ideal!). Though ideas for my posts flow for the most part, I usually have to 'work' at my writing when I force a deadline upon myself.

Acquiring writer's block (if you can call it that) was the other situation that took place. I was so excited and ready to post a blog, an inspirational piece entitled ‘A Tribute to My Parents.’ Not only did the words flow easily and effortlessly across the page (that I know came from Spirit), but also did my tears flow. I really FELT what I wrote at such a deep level as I was in an incredible state of deep gratitude to my parents.

Even though I was certain I had saved this writing piece somewhere in a computer file, I realized later that I actually hadn’t because I couldn’t find it anywhere (either on my home or work computer!). Now, how frustrating is that? Have you ever experienced that? If so, you understand what I’m talking about!

Well, since I didn’t feel like rewriting it because it wouldn’t be serving the original script justice, I’ll explain the essence of it and write about something else briefly.

As I mentioned earlier, the essence of my tribute to my parents was written in a tear-filled expression of gratitude. Somewhat similar to the ‘Tribute to a Stranger’ piece that I wrote in a previous blog in terms of gratefulness but probably at least 10 times more (than that).

When I phoned my parents asking for help to find a place, my parents suggested that they pray for me asking if that was ok with me as I was looking for a place to live (detailed in a previous blog).

Essentially, they called me occasionally that month to see how I was doing and how things were going with my search for a new home. I was truly appreciative of their emotional support and their love. And, I think for the first time in my life, I really felt my parents love for me. I really got it...this time. Wow, it only took me just over half a century! ;)

To celebrate my recent birthday, I attended a powerful healing circle facilitated by an extremely gifted healer. The theme revolved around healing issues and blocks associated with money and relationships that stem from family roots, primarily parents.

For me the healing was around living my passion and not giving up on my dream and myself. Apparently I was close to fulfilling it but then got stuck or blocked. The healer spoke directly and also indirectly about patterns using the word ‘transgeneration.' She used this term specifically when addressing me and a few others in the group.

Interestingly enough, I heard bits and pieces of myself, rather pieces of my life in other people’s stories as they shared parts of their life. This was not only for my healing but the group as well. I believe we could all relate to aspects of each person’s story in the group as I did.

Part of the information that the healer shared with me was that I am a very creative person (implying that I am to use my creativity) and the importance of being vocal. When I questioned if vocal included writing, she concurred.

As often happens when I consult with intuitionists (a term I coined), they confirm what I already know. I know that aspect about myself, i.e., that I am a very creative person with an abundance of ideas (such as creating inventions). I also feel the need and desire to be vocal (namely to express myself whether through speaking, singing, and writing).

These are some modalities of how my soul wishes to express itself. How about you and your soul?

Perhaps I will share more about this in my next blog.

In the meantime, wishing you a wonderfully joyous and abundant New Year!